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Girls groomed to be ladies

by PRIDE Newsdesk

William T. Robinson, Jr.

I hope we have not gotten to the point as a society where women have to apologize for being categorized as ladies, which at one time was the epitome of a sculptured and admired woman. We have arrived at a time where we have so many women going in so many different directions on how they want to be described or represented that they personally may be offended at the thought of being groomed to be a lady.

At one time, being referred to as a lady was considered the ultimate compliment by some men and women when referring to young women who carried themselves in an admirable and respectful manner. At one time, young girls were taught to be young ladies which was a must for men of substance looking for respectful girlfriends and wives. But now it may be debatable.

Many women see themselves as competitive powerhouses, comparable to men in every way, and may feel that being defined as a ‘lady’ may make them appear weak, subservient and submissive. But that is far from the truth if you fully understand the significance or true meaning of what some consider a lady’s ‘selling points.’ In fact, the qualities associated with being considered a lady would make you respected and marketable in the eyes of some still living in a world where they still honor intellect, dignity, morals, truth and empathy.

You would be surprised that many women today do not know or see a different between being a woman or a lady. While some will say all women are ladies, that is a gross misrepresentation. In fact, all girls will eventually become women physically, but all girls will not become ladies. That’s a ‘title’ indicative of how they carry themselves, thus warranting admiration and respect. Qualities of being a lady are reflected in a woman’s demeanor, her talk, her intellect, the way she dresses and even in her walk. A lady demands respect and will not put herself in a position to be disrespected. If she is disrespected, she knows how to politely walk away.

The decisions and paths a lady take to contribute to her respectability. Now let’s not be naïve, the reality is that we live in a world of haters and there will be plenty of women hating on other women carrying themselves as ladies because of the attention and respect they may attract. Ladies should not be apologetic for demanding self-respect for themselves, respect for others, displaying an alluring uniqueness, or a moral compass. I’m not saying many women don’t carry these attributes, but they are more profound in those professing to be ladies.

Like it or not, many men are quick to make a distinction between a woman and a lady. They claim a ‘woman’ is simply someone whom they might have a one-night stand with (or in the vernacular, engage in a ‘booty call’ with), while they considered their significant other as a lady.   Most men are adamant about wanting to marry a woman who carries herself like a lady.

You will find some men attempting to be polite and formal calling women in a group ‘ladies.’ But whether a woman like it or not, most men see a difference between a woman and a lady. However, many women are unable to decipher or think there is a difference. Unfortunately, the problem subjectively lies within.

Right or wrong, many proud, loving, and traditional families groom their daughters to be ladies, particularly fathers who are very protective of their girls. Fathers are more apt to educate their girls on the vices associated with womanizing young men, e.g., how their daughters should carry themselves in such a way as not to be disrespected or taken advantage of. Most fathers see their girls as princesses being beyond reproach and are furiously adamant about not having their daughter seen in a negative light. These parents often cater to feminine activities for their daughters. They take delight in grooming them in music, dance and social activities to awaken what they feel are redeeming qualities for a young lady.

I would imagine a young lady would not be so eager to dance to or support music disrespecting women in general. She would be adamant about not seeking a ‘bad boy’ with a reputation as a womanizer. She would not wear clothing making people question if she promiscuous. While you may have some young girls who do not like the idea of being groomed to be a young lady, it is still a ‘win-win’ for some young women looking to be respected in an ever-evolving world where self indulgence and debauchery is running rampant.

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